“Life is a CONSTANT recycling process”

“Life is an ongoing adventure”

The longer I am in this program, the more I am coming to understand that it is a Process and not a DESTINATION. Most things I have done in life, I have always had this philosophy that if I take on a project, I begin, I work on that project, I finish the project and move onto something else.

I have been told that “if you want to change, you must accept that it will not happen on a timetable that I SET… rather, it will happen when my HP sees that it is time.  My pre-arranged agenda should be to follow the instructions and enjoy the adventure.  Whenever I fight that pattern, I only feel disappointed and disgusted with myself, and I end up feeling like a failure, resentful, and angry with myself.

I am finding a better understanding of SUCCESS… it doesn’t mean that I finish the race, but rather that I continue to do what is necessary to persevere.  The analogy that “lie is a constant recycling process” now is making more sense to me… it means that I consistently sift through my days, keeping the life-giving moments and actions, and let go of what I no longer need.

The idea that “take what you need and leave the rest” helps me to sort through my feelings and actions, in light of what my HP has planned for me, and then deciding which pile I will put them.  Will I save or keep them, will I give away and let go of, and what I am not quite ready to say goodbye too.

These are the twelve Steps for me….